Of late, it would seem that I’m using this blog to express
anger that’s been stirring around inside of me for a while – truth is, I have a
lot to express. Some would say I have too much to express, which is usually why
I’m rarely silent.
The reason for this post is mainly so I can clear my head in
the best way I know, and to stop the destructive force inside of me before I do
(or say) something I might later regret.
I feel incredibly uneasy as I write this, mainly because of
all the things that have happened today. My little cousin, Jacobe, has been in
hospital all day today (but hopefully he will be out sometime tomorrow) – I spent
the most part of a night there with him and my older cousin, Katy. He isn’t on
his death bed before you ask.
Anyway… Onto something else.
Another reason for my uneasy feeling tonight is because of a
conversation I had this evening with my ex-boyfriend, Michael. He found out
that his sister and I are planning to hang out and watch movies someday soon
(probably during my upcoming holidays), and he wasn’t too happy with this
discovery. As a result, he messaged me asking me if it was true, and what I was
thinking by doing this. In my opinion, it is none of his business who I choose
to hang out with (whether it be his sister, or someone else), and I told him as
much. Unfortunately, he didn’t like being told off by me, so he decided to
continue our conversation. His responses made me scream at him (sometimes out
loud) and I was, naturally, rather agitated about the whole thing.
We are all entitled to do as we please, and no one should
feel like they need to seek the permission of others to do something… Unless it’s
something serious, but hanging out with your ex’s sister is hardly something
one would ask permission to do.
So I write this post with the intent on getting one thing
crystal clear (because he seems to be forgetting this quite a lot recently).
I am my own person; I do not live to please others. I live
for me, and all that I do (in its most simple form), I do for myself.
Stay tuned for more ‘thoughts I have’,
Tessa
Tessa
